Don Ditches Cass Reply

Summer 2000 — An eagle eye reported that the Uberhood’s leading therapist rushed over to the Goth mansion late one evening following the disaster that was the Goth-Lothario wedding party. The wedding started out as an ordinary backyard ceremony,  and it was thought that the biggest news would be about the guest list. We were pleased to see the Mother of the Bride, the enigmatic Bella Goth in attendance. How touching that Bella didn’t let the fact that she is still estranged from her husband (or the fact that the groom-t0-be was implicated in her disappearance) stop her from being there on her daughter’s big day. Mortimer’s current paramour, Dina Caliente, must have been tipped off that the Lady Goth was attending because Miss Caliente was notably absent. Unfortunately, Bella’s effort to put in an appearance was to no avail. Guests confirmed that the would-be groom, Dr. Don Lothario, was noticeably distressed. He interrupted Cassandra right in the middle of her vows, and said “I don’t” before she could say “I do.” Awww, poor Cass. We know you’re hurting now, but you dodged a bullet, girl. A big one. And speaking of bullets… Don must have some brass ones to jilt a woman with a cemetery in her backyard.


Molly Kicks it up a Notch 4

October 2000 – Rumor has it that local pastry chef Molly French is heating things up with Pizza Man Torgo Pendragon. The two met at a dough convention in Monte Vista last month and have been inseparable ever since. If these two make it down the aisle, you can guarantee that their wedding cake will be to die for.

Tori Loves Life Reply

August 2000 – This summer couldn’t be going better for Tori Kimura. Her chief political rival resigned last month over allegations of a misappropriation of funds. Now, Tori herself has found love in local handyman, Clark Sauer. If I were Tori Kimura, I’d be buying a lottery ticket next!


Holly Finds Love? Reply

July 2000–Like her father, Holly Alto is not letting her mother’s political troubles keep her at home. The young Alto was spotted chatting up an unidentified young man at the Summer Festival. Holly Alto seems to be proof that love conquers all.


Gunther Keeps it in the Family Reply

June 2000–Did Gunther Goth marry the wrong Crumplebottom sister? Sources close to the family say Gunther has been making more eye contact with Agnes than with Cornelia at family dinners. I’d be careful if I were Gunther. Those rumors about the Crumplebottom sisters being witches might be true!